The Real Reason You’re Not Healing (And What to Do About It Before It Costs You Everything)
You know what baffles me?
Most people would rather stay sick than reduce the stressors keeping them sick in the first place.
Why is that?
Why are we so quick to accept a subpar version of life?
Is it fear?
Fear of what other people will think?
Fear of being judged for taking a stand and trying something different?
Let me be real with you.
If I wasn’t worried about hurting your feelings, here’s what I’d say:
You are not a victim.
You are in choice.
Every single day.
The Cost of Inaction
One of my favorite concepts in wellness (and in life) is the cost of inaction.
When I see someone resisting change, I often wonder:
Do they really understand the price they’re paying?
Because the cost of doing nothing is invisible.
But that doesn’t make it any less real.
It’s the small, accumulating stuff:
The low-grade fatigue.
The brain fog that’s just “part of getting older.”
The aches that used to go away, but now stick around.
The mornings that feel heavier than they should.
So what happens if you don’t take action?
Nothing.
And that “nothing” is the cost.
It looks like status quo.
Stagnation.
Same symptoms. Same stress. Same story.
And if that’s okay with you? Then by all means, keep going exactly as you are.
But no complaining when your mobility slows, your symptoms intensify, or your energy tanks.
No surprises when nothing magically shifts.
Because the truth is:
Action is expensive. But inaction will cost you a fortune.
And you?
You’re here because you’re different.
You want more.
You feel that you were made for more.
So let’s talk about what it actually takes.
Step One: Belief (Yes, the Spiritual Kind)
This is the most intangible step, and also the most essential.
You must believe—deep in your bones—that healing is possible. That change is available to you. Even when you can’t see it yet.
This isn’t blind optimism.
This is fierce self-trust.
Because belief is the seed.
It’s where healing begins.
Step Two: Support (You're Not Meant to Do It Alone)
Support is essential. No exceptions.
It can look like a coach, a friend, a doctor, a therapist or a partner. The key is surrounding yourself with people who remind you what’s possible when you forget.
Pro tip: Having a trusted medical professional in your corner? That actually lowers your body’s loneliness response. (Yes, that’s a real thing.)
You need your own healing roundtable.
But you also need to pull up your own chair.
Your healing is your responsibility, but it was never meant to be a solo mission.
Step Three: Intuition (Your Body = Your Business)
You know your body better than anyone else.
Let me say it again for the people in the back:
Your body is your business.
But most of us treat our bodies the way we treat our cars.
Drive it hard.
Ignore the weird sounds.
Wait for the check engine light…
Then hand it off to someone else to fix.
And when the mechanic—er, doctor—can’t figure it out? We get frustrated.
But what if you didn’t wait for the red flags?
What if you actually listened to the whispers before they became alarms?
Your body is always speaking.
The question is: are you listening?
Step Four: Diagnose (The Real Root)
In Western medicine, a diagnosis is usually the end of the road.
In holistic wellness?
It’s just the beginning.
Because a diagnosis might tell you what’s happening.
But it rarely tells you why.
Ask yourself:
What was happening in my life before I got sick?
What patterns were present?
What stressors were unprocessed or unaddressed?
Where was I living out of alignment?
Illness is often the body’s final language.
Your job is to decode it.
Step Five: Write Your Own Rx
Sure, your doctor might prescribe meds, and sometimes those are necessary.
But you’re also allowed to write your own prescription.
When I was diagnosed with ulcerative colitis, I was handed a cocktail of medications to suppress the disease.
But no one said:
Change your diet.
Clean up your sleep.
Reevaluate your relationship with stress.
So I wrote that script myself.
I became the doctor, the patient, the researcher, the coach and the advocate.
And that?
That was the most powerful thing I could have done for my healing.
Step Six: Surrender (Before You Burn Out)
This is where things get divine.
We can surrender in two ways:
After we’ve done everything humanly possible.
Before we even begin.
The first version is where most people land, collapsed on the floor, emotionally bankrupt, then asking for help.
But what if you surrendered first?
What if you released control before the panic, before the rock bottom, before the breakdown?
Think of it like climbing a mountain.
You can drag every boulder with you to the summit, white-knuckling your way up…
Or you can lay some of them down at basecamp, and trust that what’s meant for you will meet you on the trail.
That’s the path I choose.
And I can tell you from experience, it’s the gentler one.
Here's the Thing:
“Wellbeing is not just the absence of disease or illness.
It’s a complex combination of a person’s physical, mental, emotional and social health.
Wellbeing is strongly linked to happiness and life satisfaction.
Wellbeing is how you feel about yourself and your life.”
I wish I knew who said that, but it doesn’t matter.
Because it’s the truth, and it captures what I’m all about.
You’re here because something in you is done waiting.
Done tolerating.
Done shrinking to fit a version of health, happiness, or success that never really belonged to you.
So step forward.
With clear eyes. With steady hands.
With full ownership of the life you’re building from here.
Let’s begin.