Your Body Isn’t Broken. Your Beliefs Might Be.
A no-BS guide to ditching the invisible rules that keep your health stuck.
Why Your Wellness Hacks Aren’t Working
We love to talk about “wellness hacks” as if one new morning routine or a better blender is going to save us. But let’s be honest, your Vitamix isn’t the problem. The real saboteurs of our health are the sneaky, deep-rooted beliefs we’ve been carrying around for years.
Beliefs like:
“I don’t have time to take care of myself.”
“Being exhausted means I’m working hard enough.”
“Saying yes to everyone makes me valuable.”
These aren’t just thoughts floating in the background, they drive our choices every single day. And until we rewrite them, no amount of kale or cold plunges will stick.
How I Hit a Hard Stop (and Why It Saved Me)
For years, I thought success meant saying yes to everything and everyone. I wore toxic people-pleasing like it was a personality trait, convinced it made me “easy to work with” or “a team player.”
Meanwhile, my body was quietly waving red flags. I ignored fatigue, stayed up late to squeeze more in, poured a glass (or two) of wine every night to unwind, and jump-started my mornings with caffeine before I even drank water. Movement wasn’t about joy or energy, it was about chasing external validation.
From the outside, I looked ambitious and put-together. On the inside, I was running on fumes.
Eventually, the cracks showed up in my health in ways I couldn’t ignore. That was my breaking point.
Trauma has a way of creating change you don’t choose. Healing is about creating change you do choose.
That line shifted everything for me. I couldn’t heal on top of the same old beliefs that got me sick in the first place. I had to rewrite the rules and it had to start with rewriting the beliefs I had built my entire identity on.
5 Steps to Upgrade Your Brain (and Your Body Will Follow)
This isn’t about “just thinking positive.” Your mind can’t hold two conflicting beliefs at once, so the work is about swapping out the outdated one with something that actually supports you. Think of it like upgrading your phone’s operating system—except instead of getting a dark mode update, you get your life back.
Step 1: Catch the Belief Saboteur in the Act
Think of your limiting beliefs like a broken GPS, constantly trying to reroute you, giving outdated directions, and somehow always taking you past the potholes instead of the scenic route you actually want.
Mine sounded like:
“My worth depends on what others think of me.”
“I’m only successful if I’m constantly climbing the ladder.”
“I can’t be truly fulfilled without having children.”
These are not truths. They’re hand-me-downs from culture, upbringing, or old experiences. The moment you spot them, you can stop letting them drive your bus.
Step 2: Survive the Awkward In-Between
This is the tricky liminal space where the old belief hasn’t fully left, and the new one hasn’t completely landed.
Some days, you’ll feel like you’ve stepped into the version of yourself you’ve always known you could be—calm, centered, making choices that actually support your health and happiness. Other days, it feels like you’re miles away from that version, trapped in old habits and thoughts that make you wonder if you’ll ever get there.
It’s messy, awkward, and uncomfortable—and that’s exactly why it works. Change doesn’t happen in a straight line. Like growing out bangs, you’ll have awkward phases, moments of doubt, and days where you feel totally off track. But each wobble is proof you’re moving, and every step in this awkward in-between is part of building a new default for your mind and body.
Step 3: Hand the Keys to Your New Brain
Actions reinforce the new story and make it real. Here’s how I translated my own limiting beliefs into actionable moves:
Old belief: “My worth depends on what others think of me.” → New belief: “I define my own value.” → Action: pause before agreeing to anything that doesn’t feel right and practice saying “no” without guilt.
Old belief: “I’m only successful if I’m constantly climbing the ladder.” → New belief: “I can be successful on my own terms.” → Action: take time to celebrate where you are in your career and set boundaries around extra work that doesn’t serve you.
Old belief: “I can’t be truly fulfilled without having children.” → New belief: “Fulfillment is defined by me, not by a checklist.” → Action: invest in experiences, relationships, and personal growth that make your life feel rich and meaningful right now.
Every small choice is a receipt proving your new belief is now in charge, and the more you practice, the more natural it becomes.
Step 4: Feel the Feelings Without Flipping Out
Shifting beliefs will stir emotions—guilt, shame, frustration, fear. For me, guilt was the relentless guest, showing up every time I said no, rested, or prioritized myself over someone else’s expectations.
Instead of numbing it, I started a new approach:
Name it. “Oh hey, guilt. Cute of you to show up uninvited.”
Give it a few minutes of attention. Seriously, set a timer and let yourself feel it without judgment.
Remind yourself: discomfort isn’t failure—it’s proof your mind is rewiring.
Every pang of guilt reminded me: I was breaking the old script that said “my worth depends on others’ approval.” Like soreness after a leg day, it was uncomfortable, but it also meant growth.
Step 5: Fire the Old Script and Hire a New One
Once you’ve spotted the old belief, sat with the feelings, and stacked a few “action receipts,” it’s time to rewrite the story.
Ask yourself: Which beliefs actually support the life and health I want to create?
For me, it was about replacing:
“My worth depends on others’ approval” → “I define my own value.”
“I’m only successful if I’m constantly climbing the ladder” → “Success looks different on my terms.”
“I can’t be truly fulfilled without having children” → “Fulfillment is created by me, right here, right now.”
Then make it tangible: stick the new beliefs on your fridge, set them as your phone lock screen, whisper them to yourself in the mirror—even during your morning coffee if you have to. Repetition makes them real. Over time, these new scripts stop feeling like affirmations and start feeling like truths your body and mind actually believe.
It’s a little audacious, a little bold, and entirely necessary. You’re firing the old director of your life and hiring a better one—one that finally has your back.
The Truth That Changed Everything
The biggest wellness shift I ever made wasn’t swapping wine for green juice or trading late nights for early workouts. It was realizing that my body wasn’t the problem—my beliefs were.
Beliefs like “saying yes makes me valuable,” “exhaustion means I’m working hard enough,” or “my worth lives in how other people see me.” Those were the real toxins.
Here’s the truth: no supplement, no workout plan, no morning routine can undo the damage of a belief system built on self-betrayal. But the moment you decide to rewrite the story, when you choose rest without guilt, nourishment without punishment, and movement without needing applause, that’s when healing actually begins.
Trauma created change I didn’t choose. Healing is the change I do. And every single day, I get to practice it again.