You’re Not Stuck — You Just Haven’t Decided

There’s a trend making the rounds on social media: “These are the things I’d tell you if I wasn’t afraid of hurting your feelings.”

And honestly? Some of you need to hear them.

I’m fascinated by it because it’s basically just someone calling you on your excuses.

I’ve been tempted to post my own version from the lens of a health coach. But instead of rattling off hard truths for shock value, I want to go deeper, because the point isn’t to make you flinch. It’s to get you to actually do something with the truth.

Not long ago, I came across a video from fellow coach Hattie Willoughby. She summed up exactly what I’ve been feeling:

“Decide your goal. Then make your environment agree.”

If I were coaching you and I wasn’t worried about being politically correct or sparing your feelings, I’d tell you this:

You’re not stuck. You just haven’t decided.

It can be that simple.
Want to work out in the morning? Lay out your workout clothes the night before. Get up when you said you would. Those extra 8–15 minutes in bed? Not worth it. Get up, change in the dark and get it done.

Want to eat better? Stock your pantry with food you can pronounce and ditch the rest. If it’s in your house, it’s going in your body.

Some of this comes down to discipline. But most of it comes down to this: at your core, you must decide you are worthy of the change you’re trying to make.

And the people who give you grief for it? Let them. They’ll either follow suit or they won’t, but that’s their problem, not yours.

The decision to change really is that straightforward: Decide. Then build your environment to support that decision. If you don’t, you haven’t truly decided. You’ve just made a wish and hoped it might work out, without being willing to stand in the discomfort that comes with real change.

Start small. Start private. Start with a win no one sees. For me, it was morning workouts. I laid my clothes out the night before. I set my wake-up time and treated it as non-negotiable. By the time my head hit the pillow, I already knew whether I was getting up or not, because I’d already decided.

In the early dark hours, the world is still quiet. There’s something magical about doing something with your present body that your future self will thank you for. For me, that quiet is freedom. There’s no noise, no distractions, no competing demands, just the choice I’ve already made.

And here’s the thing: once I made the decision, my environment caught up.

As a health coach, I know that truly upleveling your life means upleveling what you put in your body and what you surround your body with. That means looking at your mental, physical, emotional and even financial health. Assess each one honestly. See where you stand. Then decide and make your environment agree.

Here’s the simplest framework I know to make your environment work for you every time:

1. Decide

Get radically clear about what you want and why it matters. “I want to work out more” isn’t enough. “I want to feel strong, energized and confident in my own skin by summer” has weight. Write it down. Make it undeniable.

2. Design.

Shape your surroundings so they pull you toward your goal instead of away from it. Want better sleep? Put your phone in another room at night. Want to eat better? Stock your fridge with food that fuels you and remove the stuff that drags you down. You can’t rely on willpower when your environment is whispering, just one bite.

3. Defend.

Guard your decision like it’s a priceless piece of art. That means saying no, sometimes to people you love, often to the version of you that wants the easy way out. This isn’t about being perfect. It’s about being consistent enough that your environment starts doing the work for you.

When I first started working out in the morning, my environment was my greatest ally. My clothes were ready. My water bottle was filled. I didn’t even have to think, I just rolled out of bed and moved.

But I’ve also had seasons where my environment sabotaged me: cluttered counters, junk in the pantry, grabbing my phone before sunrise. The difference between those seasons wasn’t motivation, it was what I allowed around me.

Discomfort is the toll you pay for transformation. That moment when it feels inconvenient, awkward or exhausting? That’s not a sign to quit, it’s proof you’re right where you need to be. If it feels too easy, you’re not really deciding, you’re dabbling.

Here’s my challenge for you:

Tonight, make one decision your future self will thank you for.

Then rearrange your environment so following through tomorrow is inevitable. Lay out the clothes. Fill the water bottle. Empty the pantry. Put the phone in the other room.

Don’t wait until you “feel ready.” Decide. Make your environment agree. Then prove yourself right.